The Atlanta Falcons. What’s the first thing you think of when you hear that team’s name?
Yep. They’ll never escape it.
You’d think the Falcons have learned some lessons since then, right?
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Well this is America. We don’t learn lessons. That requires going to school, and as both teachers and kids have demonstrated recently, no one wants to do that.
So instead, the Falcons wrote a sequel to the Super Bowl with the other most hated team in the NFL:
The Atlanta Falcons had a 99.9% win probability with 2:52 left in the game.
The Dallas Cowboys won on a last second field goal.
The last time Atlanta blew a 99%+ win probability was the Super Bowl, when they had a 99.3% win probability.
Just crazy. pic.twitter.com/hy4wFsXIJa
— The Wokest Numbersmuncher (@NumbersMuncher) September 20, 2020
For those of you keeping score at home, the Falcons are about the worst team ever at holding onto sizeable lead to secure a win. Surely you’d think the Falcons would have had enough and fired Dan Quinn after that. Right? Right????
Well, they didn’t. Again: we don’t learn lessons in this country.
So one Falcons fan finally said no more and took matters into his own hands:
Today was the last straw. Please respect my decision. I'm open to team recruiters.
Thank you @dallascowboys and @dak for helping me come to this life-changing decision. #ATLvsDAL #DALvsATL #CowboysNation #Falcons pic.twitter.com/2ZveNQkyvU
— Harlen Shackelford (@Harlen_S) September 20, 2020
Whew that last line. Ouch. We’d ask the Falcons for a comeback, but obviously they don’t have any of those either.
Where is he going next?
New NFL team announcement coming Thursday night during #TNF!
Updated Top 5:
📈@Seahawks
📈@Jaguars
📉@ChicagoBears
📈@BuffaloBills
📉@SaintsStill in contention:@RamsNFL @dallascowboys
Out:
❌@Buccaneers
❌ @RaidersNever again:
💩@AtlantaFalcons— Harlen Shackelford (@Harlen_S) September 22, 2020
Good luck to Harlen, as Kevin Durant can tell you, free agency decisions can be tricky. Something tells us at least he won’t need burners to trash the Falcons.
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