Global Sports That Are Totally Bonkers: Calcio Storico

The absence of major sports through the Spring of 2020 has gotten us thinking about the lesser known sports that people from around the world might enjoy, and in-turn also be missing. It turns out that a lot of you are into some weird activities. From wildly dangerous to “how is this even a thing” level bizarre to just hilarious, here are just a few of the world’s endless examples of humanity’s ability to turn anything into a contest and to then tweak that contest for optimal violence or amusement.

Calcio Storico/Calcio Fiorentino – “Too small to be a real war, too cruel to be a game.”

Based on the original medieval version of football (soccer) created in 16^th Century Florence, Calcio Storico translates to “historic football” but might be more accurately described as prison riot football. Thought to have started in Florence’s Piazza Santa Croce, the contest is an ultra-violent blend of rugby, soccer, and just plain old fighting. Calling the combat that ensues on the field “mixed martial arts” would be an insult to drunken thugs everywhere. On witnessing an event in honor of his visit in 1574, King Henry III of France is said to have proclaimed the contest “Too small to be a real war, too cruel to be a game.”

The modern version of the sport was revived in the 1930’s by Italians living under the Mussolini regime. Today the main annual contest is played in Florence between teams representing the four quadrants of the city, the reds, whites, light blues, and greens. There are no professional players, only volunteers representing the various districts, playing for pride and passion. Florentines converge on Piazza Santa Croce dressed in and flying their colors, with colored smoke bombs and a euphoric party atmosphere leading the way.

Played on a field between 80 and 100 meters long and 40 to 50 meters wide for a single 50-minute period, the Calcio Storico is a vicious battle between 54 competitors, some of whom are looking to score goals, the rest simply to brutalize the other team. At either end of the field a large net is stretched from sideline to sideline, representing the goal. Getting the ball into the net is known as a “Caccia” and scores one point, while a “half-Caccia” occurs when a team accidentally throws the ball over the opposing net, scoring a half-point for the defenders.

Each squad is comprised of 4 goaltenders, 3 fullbacks, 5 halfbacks, and a whopping 15 forwards. At the start of the contest forwards square off with the opposition and an all-out brawl begins. The job of the 30 forwards is simply to fight one another, with the goal of incapacitating or, better, injuring the opposing player. The sport does not allow for substitutions, so teams gain numbers advantage for anyone they can force from the field with an injury.

None of this is to say that Calcio Storico is without rules. There are two. No kicking in the head and no 2 on 1 fighting. Pushing, pulling, punching, kicking, gouging, tackling, wrestling, headbutting, figure-four leglocks, nut-shots, and even choking are all entirely legal. In the early days of the modern revival of the sport, bulls would be released into the field of play, the tigers from Gladiator apparently having been booked elsewhere at the time.

Again, these players are doing this on a purely volunteer basis. There are no salaries, the only prize is a free dinner. As San Giovani Greens player Alessandro Pagliazzi puts it “I don’t get money, I just get hit, and the hits come free so you can always take them.”

Highlights: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ksJtH2CCCUY

Next Week: Fierljeppen