This Goalie Cat Might Be The Premier Athlete Of All The Sports We’ve Seen During Quarantine

I don’t know about you guys, but over the last few months I’ve sampled a whole lot of sports I didn’t even think about due to these COVID-19 times. I’ve basked in Jackeylove’s League of Legends greatness as he got hot for China’s LPL outfit. I’ve won big money in MMA DFS thanks to the glory of Aleksei Oleinik blowing up a heavily favored Fabricio Verdum. Hell I’ve joyously called the action for new Packer Devin Funchess hanging 200 receiving yards on an oppnent in a surprise during in our Madden eNFL sims. There have been some great moments in sports if you know where to look.

But this cat…this supreme athlete of a feline…he is truly the apex of quaratine athletics. The grace he plays with, the speed, the ability to make highlight reel plays out of nowhere. He’s truly a complete package. If Bundesliga wants to keep the people of the world’s interest, they should start with an offer to Meownuel Neuer. The richest contract in history for a cat seems more than fair, especially when you consider how much of it would consist of salmon-flavored treats, lasagna, and mice with catnip inside. Or would catnip constitute blood doping for a cat? Hmm. There are some hurdles to overcome but it’s in the best interests of the world to give this cat a shot.

(h/t FTW)